Dec 4, 2008

My problem

I read somewhere that the solution to my problem is to be honest and open about it. So, this post is gonna be about my problem...

I woke up this morning trying to understand what happened last night. To cut a long story short, I was drinking at a pub in Far East Plaza. I got drunk and went down to the 7-11 to buy a pack of cigarettes. I don't remember much from here.

Apparently, I was gone for a long time. One of my best friends, Vik, came looking for me. He found me trying to pick a fight with a bunch of guys. He brought me back to the 4th floor and guess what? I provoked Vik and got what I deserved.

I verbally abused my wife so many times last night. The fucked up thing is that I don't remember much. I'm hurting so much inside. I'm confused and angry with myself. I've been in bed the whole day trying to figure out what the hell happened to me. That wasn't Noel Boyd. That was a person I never ever want to see again.

My wife sat next to me in hall when I woke up. I broke down man. I didn't know if she was staying or leaving. She says she'll stay as long as it doesn't happen again. She told me all the dumb stuff I did and said. Vik says he'll forgive as long as it doesn't happen again. It's fucked up that I've hurt both of them.

These two people mean so much to me that I'm gonna do all I can to prevent this nightmare from happening again. I'm thinking of paying Alcoholics Anonymous Singapore a visit next week. I may not blog the next few days. But I will be back. Thank you for understanding.

12 comments:

  1. My brother got that way; drinking till his kidneys bled and having blackouts. He was told if he didn't stop, next up would have been his liver. It's been 5 years and he hasn't had another drink since. Think about your son and what you don't want him to be, should make you stronger. Best of luck.

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  2. HOPE ALL GOES WELL FOR U N UR FAMILY.. BEST WISHES..

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  3. haha common noel! The bright side is,you've learnt well from it. everyone screws up bad once in a very rare blue moon. don't let it distant you from your wife or your good friend.yes,its a bad experience and all,but walk over it and you'll be fine in no time (:

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  4. I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Julissa

    www.hairweavingbasics.com

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  5. Dude, I was there that night. I didn't know so much happened after I left.

    I guess, the thing should be to stop at 3 drinks. Don't over-drink the next time, dude!

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  6. hey bro, we say the worst things when intoxicated, and no matter what has happened, the important thing is to pick up the pieces and more forward, and realise what is the things that who truly treasure in life.

    what done has already been done, and now is just the healing process, and i'm sure the people close to you will forgive and forget soon enough, as long as mistakes have been learnt and no repeated.

    no matter what, i know things will get better soon enough, and that you'll reach a better place before you know it.

    all the best in the recovery process bro.

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  7. Hope I am not late for comment:
    We all learnt thru mistake :)
    Take care, Imz (Ann's fren)

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  8. You are never too late Imz! Thanks for leaving the comment. Big hug!!!

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  9. What about your dad? Don't you feel guilty towards him?????

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