Oct 18, 2006

The PERFECT Man

1. My friends are not as important as you darling.
2. Your cooking is so much better than my mother’s.
3. I’m lucky that you have slept with so many men. At least one of us has a lot of experience.
4. What’s the point in having a flashy sports car when I’m such a bad driver?
5. Getting worked up over football is ridiculous. After all, it’s only a game.
6. Forget the big match on TV tonight. The rerun of Days of Our Lives is more important.
7. Why don’t you relax this weekend? I’ll take care of the cooking and housework.
8. I do wish our young beautiful neighbour would close the curtains when she undresses.
9. I haven’t seen your mother for awhile. Why don’t you invite her to stay for the weekend?
10. How about I give you a nice massage and foot rub. I really don’t like sex that much.
11. Darling, why don’t we go out tonight? I’ll drive, you drink and I’ll introduce to all my friends.
12. Your boss is such a nice guy. Buying you gifts, dropping you home, no wonder you work late so often.
13. You know, Pamela Anderson just doesn’t have the brain power that I find so attractive in women.
14. Why would I wanna go away with my mates for the weekend when I can stay here with you?
15. Sex without love is so unappealing, and the idea of a one night stand is a real turn off!
16. Here’s my credit card. Go treat yourself. You can never have too many shoes.
17. Look at that…disgusting!! Why would she wear a short skirt like that with a thong?!
18. I’d rather go shopping with you than drink beer and watch the game.
19. You’re right! I think we’re lost. Let’s pull over and ask for directions.
20. You have my wages. I’m hopeless with money and I’m sure you could think of better things to spend it on.
21. You are such a good driver. I feel so safe when you drive my car.
22. Her breasts are too big. Small breasts are just so sexy!
23. Honey, you don’t have enough clothes. Let’s go shopping!
24. I hate porn and the idea of lesbian sex is such a turn off!
25. I’m deeply offended by young women who go bra-less.
26. I’m really sick. But don’t worry darling. I’ll fend for myself.
27. I think farting is such a dirty habit!
28. I’ve decided to have my penis enlarged.
29. Offside? I don’t understand that rule either.
30. I don’t need another drink. I know my limits.
31. Why, I would LOVE to wear a condom.
32. I insist, it’s my turn to go down on you.
33. Your butt never looks fat. It’s perfect.
34. Foreplay is the best part of sex.
35. Go ahead and eat that third piece of chocolate fudge cake. If there’s one thing I hate, its skinny women.
36. I hate it when we argue…especially because it’s nearly always my fault and you’re always right.
37. I never leave the toilet seat up after use.
38. I was just thinking of you and got you these roses.
39. Let’s just concentrate on your pleasure tonight darling…
40. Even when drunk, I think it’s important to retain bathroom etiquette and make as little noise as possible.
41. I’ve bought a new handphone. Now there’s no excuse for me not to call when I said I would.
42. Yea…you go out shopping with your friends while I do the housework.
43. Of course I don’t mind you using my razor to shave your under-arms.
44. After sex, I’ll lay in the wet patch while you turn over and sleep.
45. You look so beautiful in that new outfit. I should take you out more often.
46. Forget sex…a kiss, a cuddle and wrapping my arms around you is far better.
47. You have a drink this time. I don’t mind have a soft drink and driving home.
48. Nah…I don’t mind you talking to your ex-boyfriends. Our love is stronger than that!
49. I don’t know why guys are always talking about anal sex. Your pussy is still tight as ever.
50. Baby…you don’t have to blow me if you don’t like it. But I still wanna go down on you and please you.

5 comments:

  1. Waitaminute! How come the boys get pictures of hot girls and all we get is one dude, and a giant cock?!

    And if I ever date a man who says all (or just some) of the above, I'm so sendin him on the 1st Rainbow Bus to Happy.

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  2. The Perfect Man sounds a real bore!!!!

    Not for me, dearie...
    I go for Real Man!!!
    Hah!!!

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  3. totally agree with fel...
    sounds like gay and err..only one pic?..
    haiz...no way..not sexy enuff
    haha

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  4. to missbitchalot: i figured one pic for you girls will be enough. the giant cock was a bonus. hahaha...
    if you meet a guy that says half of that, he deserves to be sent to Happy. ive got a feeling some guys are gonna use my post on innocent women.

    to nana: you're right sweetheart. the perfect man will bore you to tears. he'll be so predictable that you might slap him after a week.

    To othersidefame: how many pics u want?!

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  5. haha.....equivalent wht u put up in the perfect women...
    hey...we girls just want a fair share alright?
    wakaka

    ReplyDelete

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