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u know u’re a drunkard when…(01)


  • You have to go to court to find out what happened.
  • You’ve talked the monkey on your back into chipping in on bar tabs.
  • You’ve been 86’d from detox.
  • The only time Shane MacGowan looks sober is when he’s standing next to you.
  • You see nothing ironic in chasing your daily vitamins with a water glass full of whiskey.
  • Your office chair is a barstool.
  • You own three beer bong patents.
  • You only drink socially, except when you’re alone.
  • You can’t stand tomato juice but love those Bloody Marys.
  • You don’t need to hire a personal trainer to encourage you to start running because cops do it for free.
  • Your PhD. thesis in political science was titled, “I Could So Outdrink Ted Kennedy.”
  • You get indignant if a wedding reception has a cash bar. Especially if the reception was hard to sneak into.
  • The simple act of returning an empty keg can spiral into an big emotional scene.
  • You started taking scuba lessons when you learned that the Titanic went down with 500 cases of Bass Ale.

2 comments:

  1. aiyo! u move your blog elsewhere and never tell me. but anyway, can see that u blog more regularly than previous times. :-) forgot to thank you for the delicious crabs that other day. See u around....

    ReplyDelete

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